Bringing a baby into the world is one of the most profound and life changing experiences there is. Along with the joy, love, and wonder, many new parents also find themselves carrying a quiet and persistent companion: Worry! You may notice thoughts like,
‘What if I am not doing this right?’
‘What if the baby becomes unwell?’
‘What if they are not getting enough food?’
Worried thoughts are a very natural part of being a new parent and they can affect mums and dads alike; they do not discriminate. New parents can often feel the pressure to appear calm and in control, but in reality this isn’t always the case. You are adjusting to huge changes, learning as you go, and your time is taken up by caring for the new little person in your life.
While occasional worry is expected, worry that feels constant and overwhelming does not have to become the ‘new normal’. Here Sally Willian from Well Minds PTS shares 6 CBT informed strategies that can help you to manage worry and anxiety effectively:
1. Acknowledge the Worry
Recognise worry as a natural part of new parenthood. Worried thoughts often start with ‘What if’ and are a worst-case scenario. Try labelling anxious thoughts as “just worried thoughts”.
2. Categorise the Worry
Worries often fall into two categories:
- Current (e.g. “The baby has a temperature” – something happening now)
- Hypothetical (e.g. “What if they get really sick?” – something that might happen)
Knowing which kind you’re dealing with helps you respond more helpfully. We recommend using a journal to help with categorising your worry.
3. Ask Yourself: Is This Actionable?
– If it’s a current worry, use problem-solving tools by making a list of possible solutions and weighing up the pros and cons of each to reach a decision.
– If it’s hypothetical, remind yourself: “I can’t act on this now” — then redirect your focus to the present moment and task at hand.
4. Watch out for Unhelpful Coping Behaviours
Be mindful of habits that seem helpful but actually fuel anxiety and worry:
- Overchecking or Googling
- Seeking constant reassurance
- Avoiding activities
- Overpreparing or procrastinating
These may give short-term relief but keep long-term worry going.
For example, as a new parent, it’s natural to seek reassurance from friends or family, such as, “Is this normal?” or “Will the baby sleep tonight?” While this may ease anxiety briefly, it can quickly become a cycle. The more we rely on reassurance, the less confident we feel in managing uncertainty on our own.
5. Do the Opposite of What Anxiety Wants
Challenge yourself to act against worry: attend the baby group that you have been putting off, reduce reassurance-seeking from others, or push yourself out of your comfort zone and take action instead of avoiding. This builds confidence in handling uncertainty and reduces worry and anxiety longer term.
6. Look After the Basics
Taking care of yourself as a new parent makes a big difference:
- Stay hydrated
- Eat regular meals
- Nap when you can
- Get fresh air and movement
- Ask for help when needed
Being a new parent is a huge adjustment: physically, emotionally, and mentally. It’s completely understandable that worry and anxiety show up alongside love and happiness. Your brain is trying to protect you and your baby, but sometimes it goes into overdrive.
The good news is that worry doesn’t have to be in charge. By learning to spot unhelpful thoughts, making space for uncertainty, and taking small, confident steps outside of your comfort zone, you can loosen the grip of worry and build trust and confidence in yourself as a parent.
And remember support is out there, and you don’t have to manage it all alone.
Head to our Find an Expert Portal to find agencies just like Well Minds PTS who can offer you personalised help based on your own situation.