Exam season has a way of turning households upside down. Stress levels rise, sleep patterns shift, and conversations with your teen can feel like a minefield. Parents often tell me they want to help their child revise but just don’t know how to support without feeling like they’re nagging. The good news is that there are ways you can help your teen feel calmer, more confident, and better prepared for exams, without it damaging your relationship.
Here are five practical strategies, drawn from my years in education and my work as a mindset and confidence coach, that can make a real difference. This is less about revision techniques, and more about revision mindset.
1. Focus on Progress, Not Perfection
Many teens fall into the trap of “all or nothing” thinking when it comes to revision. They believe if they can’t memorise everything or achieve perfect grades, they’ve already failed. This mindset fuels procrastination and anxiety.
As a parent, you can counter this by emphasising progress over perfection. Celebrate small wins such as finishing a past paper, learning five new quotes, or creating a mind map. Ask questions like, “What’s one thing you understand better today than yesterday?” This keeps the focus on growth. You could also create a ‘done list’ each evening, to highlight progress.
2. Create the Right Environment
Where your teen studies matters more than you might think. Bedrooms can sometimes be full of distractions – phones, gaming consoles, and the lure of a quick nap. Revision doesn’t always mean sitting at a desk for hours either.
Work together to find a balance:
- A clear, uncluttered workspace.
- Regular breaks away from screens (movement and daylight boost concentration).
- Access to resources like coloured pens, post-its, or revision cards.
Encourage your teen to experiment with what works best for them. Some learn better standing at the kitchen counter, others need music or silence. Giving them choice helps them feel in control – which is a huge motivator at a time when everything else about exams can feel overwhelming and beyond their control. You can also help them to create a realistic revision schedule which works with their day or hobbies. Little and often is far more effective than hours at a time.
3. Encourage Active Revision
Research and years of classroom experience show that reading and note making are the least effective forms of revision. They are a good start to re-cap the information, but need to be followed up with active strategies like testing, teaching, and applying knowledge.
You can gently encourage this by:
- Quizzing your teen with flashcards or past paper questions, (available on all the exam board websites).
- Asking them to “teach you” a topic in simple terms (if you don’t understand it, they might need to check it again to explain it more clearly).
- Using apps or websites that turn revision into short, timed challenges.
Active recall not only deepens memory but also builds confidence because your teen sees evidence of what they do know and can go back and check any information they don’t.
4. Model Calm, Not Stress
Teens are highly tuned to their parents’ emotions. If you’re visibly stressed about their revision, they’ll absorb it like a sponge. Instead, model calm. If they’re overwhelmed, help them break tasks down into manageable chunks: “What’s the first step you could take in the next 20 minutes?” If they’re doing no revision at all, try to find out why. It could be overwhelm, fear or failure or not being able to see the benefits. Understanding their worries without judgement can open the door to solutions.
Remember, revision isn’t just about content; it’s about mindset. Breathing techniques, short walks, or even five minutes of mindfulness can reset an anxious brain. You don’t have to teach these – simply suggesting a break, or doing it alongside them, shows that calm is possible even in high-pressure times.
5. Keep Communication Open
Perhaps the most powerful support you can offer is listening. Not lecturing, not fixing – just listening. Teens often bottle up fears about failure, which can grow into full-blown anxiety. A calm parent who listens without judgement provides the safety net they need.
Use openers like:
- “How are you feeling about revision today?”
- “What feels hardest right now?”
- “Is there one way I could make this easier for you?”
This builds trust and keeps the door open. When your teen feels heard and understood, they’re more likely to accept your guidance – and less likely to see it as interference.
Revision is about more than grades. It’s about building resilience, self-awareness, and problem-solving skills that your teen will carry into life beyond exams. By following the guidance above, and keeping communication open, you’re equipping them not only to survive exam season but to grow through it.
If you’d like more practical resources to support your teen through revision and beyond, visit Bright Futures Coaching where I share free tools and advice for parents and teens.
Author Bio
Jane is the founder of Bright Futures Coaching, specialising in helping teens overcome exam anxiety, low self-esteem, and confidence struggles, as well as supporting parents to rebuild connection with their teens. With 28 years of experience as a teacher and now a qualified mindset coach, she supports young people and their parents face the challenges of adolescence with calm, connection and confidence.